card

{
  "id": 496535,
  "created_at": "2020-12-22T05:07:59.000Z",
  "tag_name": "card",
  "nsfw": false,
  "owner_id": "272757640340439041",
  "uses": 12,
  "description": null,
  "restricted": false,
  "shared": false,
  "deleted": false,
  "safe": "unrated",
  "hidden": false,
  "guild_id": "771633313541914644",
  "sharer": "272757640340439041",
  "content": "",
  "embed": "{\"color\": 5198940, \"title\": \"You have received a holiday card!!\", \"description\": \"It is a {rand:beautiful hand drawn picture of~photograph of~strange etching of~crude sketch of~holographic depiction of} {rand:your friend Pigeon~a stand of trees~a sunrise~a goblin~some sort of rat~a basket full of painted eggs~a cat with a violent aura~exactly eight skeletons playing poker~somebody's pets. You don't really care whose,~a big cool monster~your favorite meal~several bored-looking children~a family, of whom you vaguely recall meeting at least once member,} {rand:photoshopped {rand:into space~over a fairy-tale scene~into a dark cave~over a huge picture of a dog~into an underwater scene~into a burning building~into a volcano~in front of a medieval castle}~against a {rand:snowy~desolate~volcanic~whimsical~rainbow} background~surrounded by a strange, alarming shadow~in front of a house absolutely drowning in ugly holiday decorations~at a popular tourist destination}.\\n\\n**When you open it, you read the following message:**\\n\\n{rand:Dearest~My accursed~To my platonically beloved~To the highly respected~To the most dangerous~To my best friend~To the Golden God~To the most blessed~To my nemesis~To my rival~Hi~O Great} {user},\\n\\nWishing you a {rand:beautiful~terrifying~haunting~cursed~hungry~magnetic~glowing~magnificent~whimsical~powerful~dreamlike~visionary~swell~spiffing~terrific~jolly~[redacted]~horny~mostly-arson-free~silly~boring~grandiose~wealthy~bonkers~baffling~hearty~mimsy} {rand:holiday~Kwanzaa~Hanukkah~Easter~New Year's~Martin Luther King Jr. Day~Birthday~Un-Birthday~Chinese New Year~Groundhog Day~April Fools Day~Mardi Gras~Super Tuesday~Purim~St Patrick's Day~Equinox~Solstice~Palm Sunday~National Tartan Day~Pesach~Ramadan~Cinco de Mayo~Sukkot~Diwali~Nowruz}! I cherish our memories of {rand:throwing gravel at politicians~having a pillow fight at a sleepover just like in the movies~falling into a deep pit and waiting sixty hours for a rescue~getting lost in a forest and having a wild adventure that ended with us being granted a boon by the forest king~planned and executed the best heist in history~[redacted] with [redacted] [redacted] while balancing a [redacted] on both our [redacted]~inventing new cusses and then using them to cuss each other out~cloning ourselves and creating an entire marching band with our clones~going on a world tour with our wildly popular musical group~overthrowing the government and installing ourselves as the new leaders~playing a whole bunch of video games and bonding like only true gamers can~enjoying a medieval feast where we ate meat off of gigantic bones and then threw the bones to the dogs like kings (vegetarian meat bone options available)}. I hope in future, we will always be {rand:friends~enemies~nemeses~angry~well-rested~tall~wealthy~well-loved~omnipotent~omniscient~married??? no-- not married--~Goku}.\\n\\n{rand:Sincerely~Insincerely~With Best Wishes~Please Free Me From This Prison~Help~I'm So Sorry~Remember My Name~You've Been Cancelled~The Card Is Over Now~Well, Anyway, Bye~Laterz~Let's Never Speak Again~I've Lost My Train Of Thought~With Pigeons~Yours~Not Yours~Somebody Else's~I'm So Lonely},\\nCaitl \\\"{rand:Egg Salad~Big Dog~Horde Of Ants~The Nap-Master~Guts~Joey 'Joseph' Josephone~Hotbody~The Anti-Horny~Wizard Lips~Tater Tot~Bugsnax~Rotting Tree Stump~Six Eggs~The Ostrich~Sky Portal~The Necromancer~Uncle Upright~Comrade Tree~Funk Sponge~Speed Racer~Cyber-Hacker~Rimbup the Crusty~Secret Pocket~Cancelled}\\\" Pigeon.\"}",
  "last_fetched": "2026-10-20T23:34:38.040Z"
}