joke

Created by Solomon#1426 Use the command [p]joke and it will tell you a joke. Have fun with it! Be sure to dm me if you would like it to have more jokes or a certain joke of your own!

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Content

2 lines
{=(joke1): I ate a clock yesterday, it was very time-consuming.}{=(joke2): My wife told me to stop impersonating a flamingo. I had to put my foot down.}{=(joke3): I went to buy some camo pants but couldn’t find any.}{=(joke4): I was wondering why the frisbee kept getting bigger and bigger, but then it hit me.}{=(joke5): I can’t believe I got fired from the calendar factory. All I did was take a day off.}{=(joke6): I threw a boomerang a few years ago. I now live in constant fear.}{=(joke7): My wife accused me of being immature. I told her to get out of my fort.}{=(joke8): I tried to catch fog yesterday. Mist.}{=(joke9): "Just said NO to drugs!" Well, if I am talking to my drugs... I probably already said yes.}{=(joke10): Light travels faster than sound. This is why some people appear bright until they open their mouths.}{=(joke11): I read recipes the same way I read science fiction. I get to the end and I think, 'Well, that's not going to happen.}{=(joke12): Money can't buy you happiness? Well, check this out, I bought myself a Happy Meal!
}{=(joke13): Women should not have children after 35. Really, 35 children are enough.}{=(joke14): It's never a good idea to keep both feet firmly on the ground. You'll have trouble putting on your pants.}{=(joke15): There are three kinds of people: those who can count and those who can't.}{=(joke16): Feeling pretty proud of myself. The puzzle I bought said 3-5 years, but I finished it in 18 months.}{=(joke17): Just burned 2,000 calories. That's the last time I leave brownies in the oven while I nap.}{=(joke18): My boss is going to fire the employee with the worst posture. I have a hunch, it might be me.}{=(joke19): Don't trust atoms, they make up everything.}{=(joke20): Did you hear about the guy who got hit in the head with a can of soda? He was lucky it was a soft drink.}{=(joke21): There are 10 types of people in this world, those who understand binary and those who don't.}{=(randomizer):{range:1-21}}{mention}{joke{randomizer}}
Raw JSON
{
  "id": 388971,
  "created_at": "2020-10-23T22:17:14.000Z",
  "tag_name": "joke",
  "nsfw": false,
  "owner_id": "707949100901072938",
  "uses": 117,
  "description": "Created by Solomon#1426\n\nUse the command [p]joke and it will tell you a joke. Have fun with it! Be sure to dm me if you would like it to have more jokes or a certain joke of your own!",
  "restricted": false,
  "shared": true,
  "deleted": false,
  "safe": "unrated",
  "hidden": false,
  "guild_id": "707949178306953287",
  "sharer": "707949100901072938",
  "content": "{=(joke1): I ate a clock yesterday, it was very time-consuming.}{=(joke2): My wife told me to stop impersonating a flamingo. I had to put my foot down.}{=(joke3): I went to buy some camo pants but couldn’t find any.}{=(joke4): I was wondering why the frisbee kept getting bigger and bigger, but then it hit me.}{=(joke5): I can’t believe I got fired from the calendar factory. All I did was take a day off.}{=(joke6): I threw a boomerang a few years ago. I now live in constant fear.}{=(joke7): My wife accused me of being immature. I told her to get out of my fort.}{=(joke8): I tried to catch fog yesterday. Mist.}{=(joke9): \"Just said NO to drugs!\" Well, if I am talking to my drugs... I probably already said yes.}{=(joke10): Light travels faster than sound. This is why some people appear bright until they open their mouths.}{=(joke11): I read recipes the same way I read science fiction. I get to the end and I think, 'Well, that's not going to happen.}{=(joke12): Money can't buy you happiness? Well, check this out, I bought myself a Happy Meal!\n}{=(joke13): Women should not have children after 35. Really, 35 children are enough.}{=(joke14): It's never a good idea to keep both feet firmly on the ground. You'll have trouble putting on your pants.}{=(joke15): There are three kinds of people: those who can count and those who can't.}{=(joke16): Feeling pretty proud of myself. The puzzle I bought said 3-5 years, but I finished it in 18 months.}{=(joke17): Just burned 2,000 calories. That's the last time I leave brownies in the oven while I nap.}{=(joke18): My boss is going to fire the employee with the worst posture. I have a hunch, it might be me.}{=(joke19): Don't trust atoms, they make up everything.}{=(joke20): Did you hear about the guy who got hit in the head with a can of soda? He was lucky it was a soft drink.}{=(joke21): There are 10 types of people in this world, those who understand binary and those who don't.}{=(randomizer):{range:1-21}}{mention}{joke{randomizer}}",
  "embed": "{}",
  "last_fetched": "2026-10-20T22:51:42.123Z"
}