showerthought

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  "created_at": "2022-04-26T10:36:52.903Z",
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  "content": "{=(ShowerThought):  {rand: If you cut a hole in a net there is less holes than before, Maybe earth is a diseased planet and that disease is old age and that's why aliens don't visit us, Every time you see an ambulance is a day that someone will never forget, Prison is probably the only place that if you break into it they'll let you stay, What flavor is water, Can 2 vegans still have beef, What if we can breathe in space but people don't want us to escape, Your future self is talking shit ab u rn, As a child we believe that adults can do anything they want . As an adult we realise that children could do anything they want., Whoever created the tradition of not seeing the bride in the wedding dress beforehand saved countless husbands everywhere from hours of dress shopping and will forever be a hero to all men., We laugh at dogs getting excited when they hear a bark on TV but if TV was a nonstop stream of unintelligible noises and then someone suddenly spoke to you in your language you'd be pretty fucking startled too., When you're a kid you don't realize you're also watching your mom and dad grow up., Dads probably bond with dogs so much because in our society men don’t get shown a lot of affection but dogs give tons of affection regardless, Being able to tolerate the sound of your own voice in a video is probably the highest form of self acceptance., Girls don't compliment guys because they're likely to take it non-platonically guys take it non-platonically because it happens so infrequently they don't know how to handle it, If elevators hadn't been invented all the CEOs and important people would have their offices on the first floor as a sign of status., Being able to do well in high school without having to put in much effort is actually a big disadvantage later in life., During a nuclear explosion there is a certain distance of the radius where all the frozen supermarket pizzas are cooked to perfection., Anxiety is like when video game combat music is playing but you can't find any enemies., Pavlov probably thought about feeding his dogs every time someone rang a bell., 11 babies have been born in Antarctica and none of them died as infants meaning Antarctica has the lowest infant mortality rate at 0%, Most people know so little that if they were transported 200 years into the past they wouldn't be able to invent anything any quicker., The sentence \"Don't objectify women\" has \"women\" as the object of the sentence., Somebody at google was just like \"yea just have someone drive down every road on fucking earth\"., College students don't want to go to graduation ceremonies but they go to please their relatives while relatives don't want to go but go to support the students; we should all just be honest and skip that ceremony and go out for pizza., There is probably at least one white guy adopted and raised in China who speaks English with a Chinese accent and strangers just assume he’s a total asshole, Apparently a lemon is not naturally occurring and is a hybrid developed by cross breeding a bitter orange and a citron. Life never gave us lemons; we invented them all by ourselves., It would be cool if after you died you could see the top 5 times you almost died., It kinda makes sense that the target audience for fidget spinners lost interest in them so quickly, The olympics is the only time when you hear \"Great execution by North Korea\" and it seems okay., We all think of Gordon Ramsay as an extremely picky food critic/chef but if your life's work was cooking and you saw a narcissistic restaurant manager breaking health code violations and making horrible food you'd be pretty angry too., Since there are 3600 seconds in an hour and most people make less than $36.00/hr their time is worth less than a penny per second. It's literally worth your time to pick up a penny from the ground., The syllables in “on your mark; get set; go” are a countdown, Being a real grown up isn’t cooking a fancy dinner it’s having a clean kitchen when you go to bed after cooking a fancy dinner., Security at every level of an airport is absolutely ridiculous. Until you get to the baggage claim. Then it’s just like take whatever bag you want., Lamps in Videogames use real electricity., The internet both almost killed off the postal service with email and then made it more needed than ever with online delivery, The spiders that live in Buckingham Palace now are probably the descendants of the spiders that lived there during Victorian times - it's a whole parallel royal family but with spiders, You aren't paid according to how hard you work you are paid according to how hard you are to replace, Manuals for TVs are regarded as useless but in five thousand years they are as valuable as the Rosetta Stone: it contains the same text in over 20 different languages and alphabets., Biting your tongue while eating is a perfect example of how you can still screw up even with decades of experience., If Eminem’s Mom wanted to she could probably make a good amount of money selling her own spaghetti sauce, Watching Sesame Street as a kid you think Bert is uptight and inflexible as an adult you see Ernie and inconsiderate and obnoxious., The biggest form of peer pressure as a kid wasn’t drugs alcohol or cigarettes. It came during exams when it was completely silent and you heard everyone turn to page 2 while you were still on the first question., We give rude elderly people the benefit of the doubt because they've been through a lot but there's a decent chance that old person has been an asshole their whole life., Google earth is one of the most incredible things ever created by man but is taken for granted as if it were nothing., Thermometers are speedometers for atoms, One of the most frustrating feelings in the world is being smart enough to know there’s a better way to do something but not smart enough to invent a way to do it., Smoking kills you, but the actual “act” of smoking is a very healthy practice - leave a stressful environment go outside for five minutes and take deep breaths., As a kid, teenagers seemed so big and scary because in most TV shows they were actually played by adults in their 20s., Watching a graduation ceremony is like sitting through a movie thats entirely end credits, The implication of a hotdog being puréed meat in animal casing (intestine) is that a hotdog doesn’t stop being a hotdog even after we eat it. By that conclusion we; as the hotdog’s casing become hotdogs ourselves when we eat hotdogs., It must suck to be an air conditioner repairman. You spend your day working in buildings that have no air conditioning. When it's fixed and finally cool you leave., The fact that the death of a scientist is headline news worldwide is in some ways the most fitting tribute Stephen Hawking could possibly have., Running from the cops is the ultimate double or nothing., Talent shows like Britain's got talent become much more disturbing when you realise that it's just 4 rich people dangling money in front of poor people and telling them to dance for their entertainment., When people brokenly speak a second language they sound less intelligent but are actually more knowledgeable than most for being able to speak a second language at all., There is no physical evidence to say that today is Wednesday we all just have to trust that someone has kept count since the first one ever., The tallest person in the world has physically experienced being the exact height of every other person in the world at some point, The first person who inhaled helium must have been so relieved when the effects wore off, Baby Yoda's first word probably came after his second word, At the age of 60 Snoop Dogg will be 420 in dog years, Being an adult is eating the crust not because you like it; but because you paid for it., Nobody cares if their deodorant is 24 hour or 48 hour they are still going to apply it once a day, Sunny D tastes like someone made a bet that they could make orange juice without oranges, Placing hand sanitizers in elevators would probably increase there usage simply because people have nothing else to do.}}\n{embed(color):{target(color)}}",
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  "last_fetched": "2026-10-20T21:56:42.346Z"
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